Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Thoughts from Gaza of June 07

Thoughts- written on June 17 and 18th

On the third day of the clashes.. the so called Hamas - Fateh fighting, I wondered, while looking through the window of our kitchen at a couple of birds jumping and falling along the noise and passage of bullets, i wondered how do these birds perceive this status.. Death...? Facing death... but with unpaid prices... and overpaid prices. Calculations of who you are and what bullet you receive, and whether you are meant to die or no, or the source means to target someone like you or not... all these features of the perception of facing death.. What would they look like or sound like to these two birds. ? as soon as i saw them reacting to the exchange of fire around our quarter, i remembered the group of pigeons which i saw in an early morning of the Israeli invasion of rammallah in 2002, on a very quiet morning, we wake up, I stand on my balcony checking the scene, and the pigeons stand on the tank gun playing. It was a very strange picture.. but it was lovely and sad in a way.

This time, my thinking suddenly went deeper.. to ask them what does this mean to you.. ? birds?

18 June 2007
I’m trying now to gather my thoughts and feelings throughout that period and put it here in writing.. I find it difficult, as many meanings seem to be transitioning from meaningful to meaningless, and vice versa. The problem is that these experiences never stop to go deeper in our minds and hearts while they seem to be going more and more towards the surface…

Tired... Confused, sometimes happy, relieved... I don’t know what do I really feel..
I can’t feel good about killings! I also can’t but feel good about dignity and fight against out political, social and economical corruption.

My brain will explode soon.. I cant even write down the more I think about it .. the less I m even interested to reach an agreement with myself.
I m trying to avoid my friends, relatives… I don’t want to talk about it.. I don’t want to know more. .

One thought has been occupying my confused brain lately… What is civil war? I know now, that this is not yet one. But its coming.. if there will be still any Palestinian entity or being on this land. I honestly think that its better to just move around the world learn better ways to face these realities and come back.. but then, there wont be realities… on our ground.

Do I still care? Well, I have no patience, apparently to even tell the stories I hear or hear more stories from either side. But, today after coming back from work (first day of work after this big event) I lied down in front of the TV, watching Al jazeera , the new government of the west bank is being formed and they seem to be serious about it and sincere.!Well.. I cried. I felt I no longer belong to these faces in any way… they were some players in my living environment, terrible ones, maybe, but they existed.. today I didn’t know what to say.. I cried. Don’t get me wrong, its not that I m so passionate about brining back Palestine… or upset about not being united,.. no. its just the misery of this division of everything.. in the meaning of peace and war.. in meanings of life and death.. Humiliation and dignity..

Very much expected from these gangs in ramallah.. no wonder we have hamas in complete power in Gaza then. Is this how leaders act… when there people are in trouble..
Maybe we are not. I mean we, Gazans..
But still, they should know that they are limited and selfish.. I feel abandoned just like Hamas.. and I m just one woman living in a nice area in Gaza, who don’t have any responsibilities towards my PEOPLE!
I try to get over the details of things. Its very difficult in this part of the world... Especially that we already have nothing to do but talk and know about alllll what is going on.

I try again, and again to see a bigger picture. And then I say the following..
Hamas is a majority. Please someone remind those in ramallah…
Hamas if continued to be smart will win more and more.
Would Fateh accept to share power! Assuming that Hamas is the problem.. which I highly doubt, Fateh hasn’t been able to hear or know of any different skinned activist but the fateh skinned! The Fateh cultured!
Well.. they grew this culture..,. but cant accept it from others. Normal. Right. You know , maybe I should read more history.

Waiting for smart moves.. not saving lives moves.. I don’t want food and medicine in gaza only.. I want respect! I want faith in anything we do.. my god we lost so many of these motivating values for living.

We lost so much…
I hope we ll recover.

76 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am grateful to read your words and to try to gain an understanding of what you must be going through, what everyone is going through in Gaza. What is so difficult for me to understand is why there is not an effort toward peace with Israel. It seems that peace among all the neighbors of the Middle East would benefit everyone in every way--businesses could be developed, people could live without fear and anxiety, problems such as environmental issues could be resolved. I guess I cannot understand hatred against another group of people, not Fatah hating Hamas or Palestinians hating Israelis (or vice versa). I'd like to see peace in the ME be the priority, a commitment to work things out. I'm not taking about governments doing that--the leaders seem incapable of it, but just people like you and I talking, learning from each other, and working together on issues as friends, not as enemies. Anyway, thanks for your post --try to stay safe. Perhaps better days are ahead. lynne

Julie said...

What is so difficult for me to understand is why there is not an effort toward peace with Israel

It's hard to make peace with a country that shuts your borders, controls your movements, starves your people then says "now that you see how powerful we are, let's talk" but only if you agree to this and this and this first, and if you don't, we'll bomb you until you see the light, then we'll talk again.

Why is there no effort at peace with Palestine? Why is there no effort to comply with the 65 UN resolutions Israel is violating? Why do they not stop demolishing people's homes as if they are worth nothing?

How do you talk to a government like this, who will only talk to the leaders of their choice?

Anonymous said...

Thank you for your writing about your feelings and your thouths.

Anonymous said...

Julie, I share your disappointment that there is not peace, though we see things a bit differently. Actually, Israel does allow goods and materials to flow into Gaza, while Egypt on the other border does not. Israel does still provide water, electricity and other services, opening its borders to allow Palestinians to obtain medical care and to work in Israel. The checkpoints and the terrible inconvenience that Palestinians face daily is the result of terrorist attacks. It was not always that way. I agree with you that Israel must take every opportunity to assist those in Gaza and the West Bank, to work for peaceful and mutually beneficial relationships, and to help the Palestinian people obtain their own independent state. lynne

Tsedek said...

What would your ideal look like, Naj? Do you have dreams?

Anonymous said...

"Actually, Israel does allow goods and materials to flow into Gaza"

Uh...yeah. Sometimes. But then not for a long time. Then suddenly again. That means--there's no way to build a functioning economy of trade. You must have dependable access to markets and partners, not maybe yes, maybe no.

Also--while I think there is sufficient blame for both sides--every moment, night and day, more land is being taken from the Palestinians through confiscation and wall building, through purchasing land from people made impoverished by Israeli policies, etc. Settlement expansion continues in the West Bank...if that could stop, that would strengthen the forces for peace on the Palestinian side.

There are MANY things the Palestinians could do as well. Foremost, get serious about stopping the rockets from Gaza...

Jerry

Dua' said...

Naj, I've just read your post. U said it all. I cried too. A sharp knife drew its ugly lines within every single intch of my helpless internal self.
What even hurts more is that all the support whether financial or other goes to the corrupts.
I've never suported Hamas nor Fatah. But what is going on now with the all the external support to Fatah is just the road to the decay of Fatah's political role on the palestinian scene and an enhancement of more segregation and seperation among Palestinians on the one hand and between Palestinians and the rest of the World on the other. Yesterday, Fatah was targeted by Israel, Today Hamas is. Who knows who is next on the list....
All what I can say, it seems life proves everyday that peace is hard if not impossible to achieve as long as there is occupation by a strong power. This is not to put the blame solely on external powers but they are great players in digging larger graves....

Anonymous said...

Naj, Dua,

I'm working my way through your posts and the comments included there. Do keep writing. I feel sure that you're reaching more people in more corners of the world than you may realize.

Lune Keltkar

Anonymous said...

Naj, Dua',

I just came across commentary on the Gaza situation. I don't know how closely this commentary reflects your experience, but I thought that I would send you the link:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,2177889,00.html

The commentary is published in today's GUARDIAN.

Lune Keltkar

Anonymous said...

Naj, Dua',

I just came across commentary on the Gaza situation. I don't know how closely this commentary reflects your experience, but I thought that I would send you the link:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/story/0,,2177889,00.html

The commentary is published in today's GUARDIAN.

Lune Keltkar

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Chet said...

Naj, you are reaching people from the 4 corners of this world. I am sorry I haven't been around to your blog much in the last few months. you have always been able to put in words that others could understand and feel in their heart what you are going through. My prayers go out to you.

Just so you know, More Americans are starting to get active and ask why this is being allowed to happen to and in Palestine. Many are turning away from Israel and I hope that is a sign that the next President will listen to us and the right thing.

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梁爵 said...

2019.08.28台北市政府21日下午舉行酒店工作會報,會中酒店經紀商業處報告北市飲酒店、小吃店裁罰情形,其中有兩家知名酒店業者因違反土管遭罰,柯文哲當場質疑,為何八大行業會有業者明知違規但仍要砸千萬投資裝潢?他是無辜老百姓不知道犯法、還是他們覺得「很穩」?哪一種?最後柯更裁示,要求把該酒店上班的地址送到市長室,「市長去看就好了,我跑去消費一下。」酒店經紀指出,凱冠名店(原富都名店)、晶都名店(原全盛名店)兩店,皆因未辦妥酒吧業許可即營業,經複查後仍經營酒吧業,且同時違反建築法,爰由建管處從重裁罰業者6萬元並限期3個月改善,前者期限為9月28日,後者期限為8月27日,商業處將進行複查並得以連續開罰。聽完報告後,柯文哲直言有疑問,如果要開一個酒店,業者要投資3千萬去做不合法的東西,他怎麼敢?如果開一家老人茶室裡面簡單擺幾個桌子就算了,「花好幾千萬裝潢結果是非法的,我每次都很好奇他怎麼敢?除非他很有把握,不然他怎麼敢?」另外,建管處補充,該兩家業者使用的區域並非酒吧、飲酒店業,已經違反土地使用分區管制,未來解套方就是變更營業態樣,可以透過縮減營業面積的方式,否則就依《建築法》連續開罰,後續還可加重裁處。柯文哲表示,哲以後就是抓到那種裝潢很貴的非法的東西,第一個要問這是誰管的酒店上班,甚至還追問當地為哪個警分局的轄區。隨後柯說,為什麼可以限期改善?是酒店變咖啡廳?不能營業就是不能營業。

梁爵 said...

2019.09.17.八大行業酒店快報酒店經紀30歲「竹聯十五份幫」成員酒店工作下班陳男昨晨與酒店經紀友人搭計程車回台北市萬寧街住處,下車時卻遇槍手伏擊,陳男右大腿中1槍,送醫院急救,暫無生命危險,涉嫌開槍的酒店兼職20歲四海幫份子梁男案發1小時後,主動到派出所投案並交槍,警方還在釐清其開槍動機。警方初步調查,涉嫌開槍的梁男是四海幫份子,擔任酒店經紀的陳男是林森北路大型酒店的「酒店打工圍事項目」成員,雙方人馬今年4月間曾在東區1間酒店酒後衝突,事後多次尋仇鬥毆,警方目前積極偵辦中。

梁爵 said...

2019.09.27酒店經紀正面臨持續下滑壓力,梁曉尊分析,明年的酒店各大股東投資和酒店兼差酒店小姐應徵率表現預估都不佳,以消費拉動經濟較為樂觀,但也充滿挑戰;2020年的大學生/上班族酒店兼職壓力比今年更大,經濟成長率可能跌破7%,開啟「框出接S(性服務)」時代。知名酒店經紀指出,專家梁小尊25日在中國上海發表對中共經濟展望的看法。他表示,美「中」貿易戰就算能達成協議,衝突仍可能長期化。他也點出,「中」方以美元計價的出口額,今年8月中罕見出現負成長,夜總會酒店業者年減2%。

梁爵 said...

2019.10.05知名酒店經紀獨家分析:每當看到酒店上班酒店小姐被「框」出場性侵的新聞,就覺得很無奈,一方面是為了有酒店上班姊妹遇到這樣的事情很難過,一方面是被新聞誇張不實報導,引起社會的恐慌甚至各大留言板的對話更讓人翻白眼。某些人,對大學生/上班族酒店兼差的新人對於「框」有很大的誤解。八大行業資深酒店經紀解釋裡說的「框」,是指直接包下小姐特定的時間。其實最單純來說,功能有兩種:把小姐找過來或留下來、帶小姐出店家。有時候到店家找自己認識的小姐,但酒店小姐目前在手工(打手槍) 、口爆(口交)服務其他客人,想要把該名小姐找過來,如果用點的,遇到對方喊加點,就只能喊框了;或是有其他客人想點走正在服務自己的小姐,加點後對方又喊框,如果這時前桌喊框,效力是優於後桌的。看起來很複雜,但簡言之,就是把小姐留在自己身邊的一種方法。而「框出」的定義和內涵,就值得深入討論了。歡迎想要高收入賺現金酒店打工的大學生/上班族,可上網求證對八大行業得相關資訊做核對比對甚至多比較,才能賺錢賺得到同時要保護自己。

梁爵 said...

2019.10.22台北市酒店上班為迎接年底大量酒店小姐酒店工作,知名酒店經紀梁小尊/梁小尊執掌上市股份國際娛樂經紀公司將再台北設立就業服務處參與大學生酒店打工現場徵才活動,於10月21日至10月25日邀請20家八大行業酒店業者參與,有酒店兼差公開平台、便服店、禮服店、制服店、飯局、伴遊、國際跨國援交(陪睡性交易)等行業,提供多達360個工作機會,職缺多元且有部份職缺是可於2020年後上班,歡迎有興趣的求職上班族有興趣酒店兼職或是想轉職先行卡位,把握現場應徵的機會,早日找到未來理想的新生活。

梁爵 said...

2019.10.29台北市八大行業酒店上班即時新聞:隨著近年知名網紅跨國賣淫,讓酒店工作市場發展酒店小姐接S(性交易)崛起,然而有特別性服務文化仍為消費者的青睞,如:顏射(精子射在臉上) 、口交口爆(精子射在嘴裡) 、戴套肛交進行交易專業精緻化,也大大提昇上班族願意酒店兼職提高薪資水平,尋找優秀人員的意願。本次大學生酒店兼差有為1節最高可達$200元,對於找兼職求職者可以說是敞開大門,彈性排班的多元酒店上班就業機會,釋出兼差兼職酒店打工最高可達$100K。本週還邀請「知名酒店經紀有限公司」,以[翻轉低薪、搶救年輕人]為軸心,致力於推動八大行業酒店上班為目標。歡迎就業、轉職、兼職需求的民眾把握難得八大行業徵才酒店小姐的機會,著正式服裝至現場與徵才直接面試,找到合適的酒店工作。

梁爵 said...

2020.03.29
會選擇上午場酒店工作的小姐們 梁曉尊/梁小尊 劃出4個族群
1:單親媽媽為了照顧小朋友
2:避開家人男友的疑慮(住家裡也是很大的因素)
3:大學生酒店上班兼職(分擔未來的學費)
4:上班族酒店打工兼差(不想放棄白天的本職學能,一方面酒店PT多少增加額外收入)。
經常有人詢問酒店上班:為何有午場呢?
A.一般店家會開設午場的原因:
1.主要就是分攤晚場的營運成本(如房租和水電費用)
2.避免客人和業績幹部的流動(有些消費者會因故提早消費 怕流失到其他店的午場)
所以午場可以說是附屬 各店還是以晚場為經營主力
B.為何午場的生意只是晚場的2~3成呢 原因有以下:
1.一般商務客 於5點下班 7.8點用完餐 大約九點左右到店內消費(這是最單純的消費客層)
2.下午的消費者 可以說十分特別(就如同妳不會凌晨2點去超市買菜一樣... 就是怪!!)
因為午場的消費者較少 所以生意量普遍不高(收入也可能是晚場的2~3成)
C.一般午場八大行業的時段為何?
以下打卡班次:
下午:3點班、4點班、5點班、6點班 (每個班次往後推7小時,就是妳的上班時間)
晚間:7點班、8點班、9點班 (每個班次往後推7小時,就是妳的上班時間)
註:
1.必須把最後一桌坐完(例如客人7點進場消費到10點半 妳要坐到該客人離場 不能中途卡檯)
2.若堅持9點離開公司 則公司於7.8點左右就不會安排妳看檯(對收入有很大影響)
所以許多小姐大都會選擇午場跨晚場 (一星期加班晚場2~3天 該桌結束 可隨時下班) 以增加自己的收入。

梁爵 said...

2020.05.18酒店小姐的基本介紹跟工作內容受到疫情影響,全台酒店、我在酒店上班的日子遭勒令停業,酒店小姐也暫時失業。一名網友就表示酒店小姐一定有S?,他看到有些新時代的獨立女性都會說,做酒店 八大行業是哪八種行業呢?不一定會賣身,只是趁年輕趕緊存錢,且不偷不搶已經存到人生第一桶金;不過原PO好奇,「酒店妹職場須知 【酒店PT 】不是會被帶出場嗎,難道只是單純吃宵夜?」貼文曝光後引發熱議。原PO在PTT指出,他看到一些新時代的獨立女性,都會說做酒店不一定會賣身,只是趁年輕存錢,「不偷不搶已經存了第一桶金,酸民有嗎?」而這種文章下面一堆女孩點讚,但原PO疑惑,「酒店妹不是會被帶出場嗎,難道只是單純吃宵夜?有沒有酒店打工這方面的八卦?」貼文一岀引發熱議,網友紛紛回應:「不一定賣身是在說別人,用別人的案例說服你」、「好像帶出場做什麼都可以,就是賣時間陪你,但S要另計的樣子」、「就S…不然能幹嘛」、「看是哪種框」。除了發生性行為外,也有過來人舉出自己的經驗,紛紛表示「玩動物森友會」、「麻將缺一位,湊酒店妹不行哦?」「有錢人都花錢帶酒店妹去聊天啊」、「吃清粥小菜」、「唱歌、打保齡球、打撞球、射飛鏢」、「看臉,臉不OK就吃消夜」、「打遊戲王卡」、「踏青旅遊逛書展」、「上次帶一個大學生出場,請她幫我寫期中報告」、「我朋友上次框酒店妹出來幫他解微積分題目,給你參考 」、「談情說愛」、「遊戲王決鬥啊,妹子沒輸過」、「探討人生哲理」、「補習英文啦」、「相約考國考」。

梁爵 said...

2020.08.02【爆】不敢來酒店上班-酒店打工的原因有關於八大行業酒店上班【簽約/合約】的問題!我梁曉尊做一次總解答讓妳們解決心中的困惑。
1: 酒店小姐的基本介紹跟工作內容已現在酒店上班沒有所謂的簽合約/切結書,因為這樣是綁小姐的做法,很不道德…【小姐總有一天會離開,強求她留在八大這是不人道的行為】
2: 我在酒店上班的日子在職人員想更換經紀人或酒店不想做了…卻有合約在身怎麼辦~…!?我梁曉尊直接跟你說可以馬上離開了
a : 酒店兼差不是一個複雜的工作環境?合約內容酒店小姐上班通常會取什麼名字?本身要件要有【商營利事業登記編號/還有政府認證核發蓋章】因為這些文件都是要繳稅的….一但登報稅了,您自己想想妳在職期間這幾年{妳}家人~早就會知道你在八大行業了…..反而家人卻沒發現,每年也都沒有繳稅單更沒有勞健保,因為這份是假合約【法律用語:偽造文書】
b :合約內容常有一段話:幾年以內不能離職/幾年內不能更換經紀人。這番話已經觸犯【法律用語:強制罪】
c :從一開始的違法合約到內容的不人道,甚至離職還又要賠償..。我梁曉尊跟妳說【妳被唬了】
d : 酒店小姐去酒店上班都一定要出場接s嗎?重頭到尾觸法的假合約,真的到警察局/法院 {妳}是贏家。
e :我梁曉尊做經紀人快十年了…我還沒見過有經紀公司拿著合約去警局敢賭這件事。

梁爵 said...

2020.09.02不敢來酒店上班-酒店打工的原因最近梁曉尊應徵時, 酒店小姐的基本介紹跟工作內容有些女孩們都會問到有沒有行政助理的職缺?
這是在酒店業存在很久的應徵的騙人噱頭了, 我在酒店上班的日子其目的就是以高薪來引誘不知情的美眉上門應徵,應徵時再叫一位大姐姐或是阿姨之類的老女人面試,談話聊天的同時再混淆妳的價值觀,告訴妳脫衣陪酒是小事一件,他們會說只要有錢賺,犧牲是應該的!用這種釣魚的方式來引誘天真無邪的女孩們,加上美麗的話術做包裝,實在會讓沒有社會經驗的女性心動不已,於是踏上了一條黑暗的不歸路!!
如果行政助理月薪有50000元,有誰要去當酒店小姐呢??
梁曉尊說在酒店可以很有尊嚴的賺錢,妳不用出賣肉體也可以生存,不要想一步登天,月入三十萬要付出什麼代價妳知道嗎?
酒店小姐不要去做特別交易,用公務員的心態來上班,月入十來萬不是難事,何苦去出賣色相呢?
被警察抓到怎麼辦? 妳的經紀人能幫妳嗎? 他也因妳違法要避風頭!
妳之前賺的錢夠妳打官司嗎? 妳在坐牢期間家裡的生計可以維持嗎?染上性病或愛滋病怎麼辦?
很多事情的前因後果要想清楚!酒店應徵的廣告說的愈生動就要愈小心,小心糖衣的背後就是陷阱。

梁爵 said...

曾出版過《手槍女王》一書的女星袁非,酒店經紀也是Podcast節目《袁非人生信念研究所》主持人,近日她接受知名酒店經紀經YouTuber《台客劇場》製片酒店經紀邀訪大談「半套小姐聊八大,邊聽邊流汗,尺度滿載」,自爆擁有大學學歷的她,當年為何會下海以及上岸後的感想。袁非透露從小家境不好,大學畢業後只找到義大利餐廳外場工作,月領18K,她當時很緊張,心想「我年輕可以衝的時候,卻只能領18K,又要生活又要拿來還,什麼時候才能可以有自己的一片天?什麼時候才可以翻身?」她後來理解一切都是錢的問題,加上一直遇到性騷擾,索性下海從事八大行業。她說:「好啊,既然都要被欺負,我寧願收錢被欺負,就決定乾脆下海做半套店。」但是她堅持處女下海、處女上岸。被問到感情事,她說自己小時候都一直活在經濟困難,都在賺錢,沒時間交男友、沒時間談戀愛,她還自嘲聽到有人初夜開價10萬元,她看下面的眼光從此不同,但她相當自豪有Hold住沒賣掉。酒店經紀袁非表示,這個終究是違法、並不是一個真正能站上檯面說的職業,她也接受過許多異樣眼光,但是她認為這是從古至今就有的行業,現在都已經2022年這麼先進了,大家對這個行業都停留在遠古時期,這個行業可以做到整條街、幾十萬人靠此維生,居然沒有任何一個人想露臉分享給大家,讓她決定跳出來公開八大行業的秘辛。被問到是否有建議給想從事八大行業的女性,她說這行是CP值很高,付出較少的時間、獲得相對高的報酬,但她也提醒做這行的負面影響就是會變笨:「第一個會影響跟另一半的性生活,不一定會影響感情,但性生活一定會受到影響。第二個是小心會變笨,因為這個工作不需要思考,等到上岸以後,很多事情要自己思考,會變得很有障礙、很有困難,真的會變笨,腦筋跟記憶力會衰退。」